We had a difficult week last week. Without going into much detail we heard of a potential opportunity that seems to have fallen through by this point. While last week was definitely hard for us, we felt that if the time was right, we were ready to receive a child in our home.
Our baby room is pretty much all set. Obviously it will forever be a work in progress as we add and as a child grows in it, but we have the basics of what you need to welcome a child. First few months, the baby would sleep in our room obviously, but it is definitely good to know that we have everything pretty much set and ready to go.
One thing that we have learned and has been the hardest for us is that with adoption there is no time frame, it isn’t like having biological children that you know you have so many months to prepare for a child, that has been one of the hardest things for us. Yes, we could get a call that a pregnant woman wants to meet us and she may be half way through pregnancy or close to giving birth and that would give us some kind of hypothetical time frame, but we could also just get a call and have to take off. We are grateful that we have both had that talk with our employers that we may just need to leave suddenly one day and start our leave at work, we are both blessed to have understanding bosses that are perfectly OK with that happening.
We are more ready than we have ever been, our home and hearts are so ready for this!
The theme of the majority of 2016 for us has been WAIT, be patient, this is a theme that whether we wanted to or not, we learned we had to embrace, we had to do it and we had no way around it. Waiting has been the major theme for us, from moving from a waiting to wait list, to a waiting list and now we officially are an active family with our agency.
The last couple weeks we finally received our completed home study and this was submitted to the agency yesterday, meaning that in the eyes of the State of New Mexico we are fit to adopt parents. We also had to fill out lots of paperwork and go over things that we would be OK and not OK in a child, this last part was hard as we had to go over a list of things that we would be willing, consider or not be willing to parent. Some things we would not have a problem and others we had to cross out the list. We say weird because this list really is something we would even have to think of if we had biological children, and we kept being told that “there is no wrong answer”, but it still felt a little strange to go over what we feel comfortable.
So at this point we basically are finishing up the paperwork (of which there is a lot when you are adopting) and mailing that back to the agency so they can officially show our profile to birth parents. We also just a couple days ago received our photo album, which we will be giving to the agency as well. Once that happens we literally could get a call in a matter of weeks or even months, it is out of our hands completely as we wait to get a call from the agency.
Again, we wait, but this time this could be the final waiting before we become parents.
Just keep on waiting…
So far we have been slightly slow on the “getting the baby room ready” department, this is mostly because of the fact that we have been on the waiting list to be on the waiting list, and then on another official waiting list. We didn’t want to get too excited about buying baby things, assembling furniture and preparing the room because we figured “it’s going to be a while”.
That is until now of course! If you scroll down to our previous blog post (as in this one right here), you will remember that we FINALLY got taken off the official waiting list and are now ready to be moved to being an active family for potential birth parents to view our profile. We have been careful with not setting up the baby room and getting too much baby stuff until this point. We’ve been given a few things like a crib, bassinet, high chair and a few necessities. Today we bought a few other things to set up “the room” and feels great to be nesting.
The time is coming close for us…well at least we would like to think it is close. Yesterday we got to fill out some paperwork (some of it hard to do, more on that in a later post) and our home study is just about finalized. We are about to officially become a “listed” family with our agency, Adoption Assistance Agency. The Agency we are working with only works with 10 families at a time and we are getting moved up to being one of those active families that they work with. This means once everything is set to go we could get a call in a matter of weeks or it could be months (or longer) that either a birth parent is interested in our profile or they could call us telling us a baby has been born that fits our profile. We are being proactive and trying to be as ready as we can for when the baby comes because as we have said before, when you’re adopting there really isn’t a specific time frame to wait, it could be from one moment to another that we could be parents.
We want to be ready for you!
Future Mom and Dad!
Waiting is hard…
As we write this, we know that we are number 10 on the waiting list still with the adoption agency. This number 10 means there are still 10 families ahead of us waiting to begin their process of adoption. So this means that before us, there will be 10 people that will get to begin working with the agency to reach the ultimate goal of adopting a child. There are 10 families waiting ahead of us to be completed.
So we are waiting…and we will continue waiting.
Waiting is not necessarily a bad thing. Waiting means we have more time to prepare financially and continue to fundraise to reach our ultimate goal. Since we are getting close to the holiday season, we will be launching a few “end of the year” fundraisers including an online auction (perfectly timed for people to get their Christmas shopping done) and also a bake sale, because who doesn’t like baked goods in the fall?
We were told by the agency that we should be moving up the list soon, but that doesn’t guarantee that things move faster anytime soon either. In the mean time we will just continue waiting.