We had a difficult week last week. Without going into much detail we heard of a potential opportunity that seems to have fallen through by this point. While last week was definitely hard for us, we felt that if the time was right, we were ready to receive a child in our home.
Our baby room is pretty much all set. Obviously it will forever be a work in progress as we add and as a child grows in it, but we have the basics of what you need to welcome a child. First few months, the baby would sleep in our room obviously, but it is definitely good to know that we have everything pretty much set and ready to go.
One thing that we have learned and has been the hardest for us is that with adoption there is no time frame, it isn’t like having biological children that you know you have so many months to prepare for a child, that has been one of the hardest things for us. Yes, we could get a call that a pregnant woman wants to meet us and she may be half way through pregnancy or close to giving birth and that would give us some kind of hypothetical time frame, but we could also just get a call and have to take off. We are grateful that we have both had that talk with our employers that we may just need to leave suddenly one day and start our leave at work, we are both blessed to have understanding bosses that are perfectly OK with that happening.
We are more ready than we have ever been, our home and hearts are so ready for this!
This weekend we had our adoption yard sale fundraiser, and boy did we not know what we were signing up for! It was a lot of work but definitely the hard work paid off.
From family and friends gathering stuff and spring cleaning their homes, to volunteers that showed up to help set up and clean up as well as friends that so graciously let us borrow their home and space to have our yard sale, this became another clear example to us of the community that loves us and supports us and that we are so grateful to be a part of and that we also can’t wait until we have this child placed in our home and lives to share this joy with some day.
As we got a chance to rest and debrief about it, we are so grateful for all the help. We started the morning around 4:30 to get ready and set up and had some early birds waiting already to go over our stuff. We also were amazed at what seems to be this yard sale sub-culture we did not know much about, as we folks came and went looking for what they needed, it was awesome to know that every dollar is going towards the adoption fund we have working so hard to increase.
From the bottom of our hearts, thank you!
(Luis speaking) Thanksgiving really is my favorite holiday of the year, I would be lying if I said I like Christmas more, but honestly T-day is my top favorite holiday. This has nothing to do with being to just eat delicious food all day and have an excuse to have several servings and have the shape of a turkey by the time you are done eating (although that is a perk of the holiday), but it is always a good reminder of just being thankful of the big and small things in life.
As you already are aware of, this is the year we decided to adopt and it is crazy to think where we were not even a full year ago as we never thought that this would be the path that God would be leading us into. This is something we are and will always be thankful about, how our hearts were changed into hearts of adoption. We always wanted to adopt, but this time last year we were still hoping that maybe those pregnancy tests would come positive, and while seeing negatives almost every month was hard, we are now in peace and are looking forward to what next year will bring.
This year we also decided to do things a little differently than we usually would as we decided to decorate our house for Christmas on Thanksgiving *gasp!* instead. This breaks our tradition of decorating the day after Thanksgiving that we usually have as we were both raised in homes where “you should never start celebrating Christmas before Thanksgiving”, my Mom actually gets really mad at how TV and stores start having Christmas stuff way earlier every year, so growing up really we never started celebrating anything Christmas-y until after Thanksgiving was done and over with. We decided to start early for the first time ever for a few reasons:
- The last couple of years we have been moving around the Holidays. Two years ago we moved out of the apartment we lived in when we first got married (we had outgrowned our descent sized 2 bedroom apartment) and we moved into a 3 bedroom town house where we had planned on spending at least 2-3 years until we decided we were ready to buy a house, but then in 2014 we all the sudden decided the time was now and bought a house and we closed on it a couple days before Christmas (we actually moved into this house on December 26th), so we didn’t want to have to put up all the Christmas decorations only to have to pack them in boxes again, so in a sense we have not decorated for Christmas in 2 years so we couldn’t wait to actually get to do that in our own home.
- I work tomorrow (on Black Friday) as the bank I work for is only closed on Thanksgiving so I will be at work and we didn’t know if we wanted to wait until I got off work or just do it all on Saturday, plus I leave for a week long work training in Albuquerque on Sunday so we didn’t want to be all rushed to put everything up before I left.
- Really there is no #3 as #1 really is the main reason for doing this early.
Another thing we wanted to highlight is the beginning of a new tradition we decided to start as a family, all my wife’s idea. This year my wife and my cousin Ruby decided they wanted to adopt a local fire station and bring them Thanksgiving meal, they found out about this opportunity through a group they belong to on Facebook. Ruby is making the turkey and ham and Danielle is making the sides to go with it and we will be taking it to the fire station for the firefighters that are on duty and don’t get to spend the day with their families to enjoy a good home cooked Thanksgiving meal.
As Danielle and I were enjoying some coffee and pumpkin bread this morning she thought of the great idea of when we have kids (and really starting this year) of spending half of the day serving others and half of the day doing the traditional Thanksgiving stuff. This can include doing the fire station hosting again, serving at our local Soup Kitchen and feeding the needy or something related to the military as well, just really something to give back to the family. She said that this would be a good way to remind them that we shouldn’t take the idea of spending the day with family for granted as there are so many people who don’t get to do so.
I definitely married a good and smart wife!
This is just a little insight into what the Guerreros are doing this Thanksgiving and we wish you all have a happy day with your friends and loved ones!
I turned 30 on Sunday (September 13) and Danielle had a little plan to welcome me to a new decade of my life. Apparently she had been planning on throwing me a surprise birthday party since before we even got married.
Why wait until 30? When we got married I was 26, which had already passed that milestone of 25, so 30 made sense. All day I was thinking we were going to go out (this was Friday) and just celebrate very low key, but as I was leaving work she called me asking me if I could stop and pick up some Aleve, so I did (she was really trying buy time). I got home and saw party signs and heard a loud “SURPRISE!” from a group of our closest friends, and wow was I surprised?!
Married men, your wife is your best friend and your biggest supporter and mine is special, she is so caring and loving and just think of all the smallest details to make sure I am happy. I couldn’t really think of anyone better to go through life and parenthood with. It makes me sad when I see and hear of men that treat their wives terribly as if they were idiots and have no respect for them, because your wife is the person that God handpicked to walk along your side.
So far my 30s have started really great, and as I ponder what the next decade will be like (which I have no idea) I am happy that I get to do that (and many more) with my wife Danielle.
A dear friend of ours that is also an adoptive parent shared this on our Facebook this week. These words resonate so much as we think, pray and already love our future child (children, let’s be honest!). We have no idea what he or she will even look like or where he or she will come, but we already love our kid, more than words can express!
As the days get closer and as we continue to raise funds to adopt you, we love you more than you will ever know. Someday you will make us a lucky Mom and a lucky Dad.
Ok, so just like my wife I usually don’t subscribe to cliches, but I felt like my wife is deserving of being my Woman Crush Wednesday every day! (Also, she said some really pretty things in this blog post about me the other day so it is my turn to give back).
My wife Danielle is a great woman, my best friend and partner for the rest of my life and I really can’t imagine anyone else to do life with. One of the (many) things I love about my wife the most is how loving, caring and compassionate she is. Anyone that has ever met her in person knows and can agree that she has a big heart, which is why she is a social worker. She has such a huge heart for making an impact and helping others learn and improve their life situations and I don’t know how she does it, some days I just sit and wonder how she deals with some of the things and stories she hears from the women and children she works with.
There is no doubt in my mind that when the day of adoption finally comes she will be a great Mom, and will definitely be like no Mom I have ever met. We often joke about how our kids from a very young age will use terms like “safety boundaries” and “coping skills” that their little friends may find it annoying, but that is because she will always make sure that they are safe and will teach them those valuable lessons, plus she learned from her Mom who is a great woman. I have so much respect for my Mother in law because she worked so hard to make sure that her daughters not only lacked anything, but would grow up to be strong women and I see that every day in my wife eyes. I know that Danielle will strive to be a great parent, just like her Mom is.
I am blessed to have her walking in this adoption path with me, and it is a path we never imagined we would end up walking, at least not at this point of our lives. I will never forget one of the very first real conversations we had when we started entertaining the idea of struggling with fertility, Danielle in tears talked about how yes it is great that while we don’t have kids we have freedom, we can pack up our bags and go out of town or go out late for dinner or to the movies without having to worry about finding a baby sitter or someone to watch her kids, but that she would also give that all up to be a Mom. She would give up in a heart beat all to be a Mother and hearing those words was one of the most heart breaking things to hear. This came from a strong woman realizing the one thing she wanted the most, may not be a possibility for her, that she may never get to experience what it is like to feel her baby move or kick inside her. It was truly a tough moment for me as a husband to witness that, but it was also one of the moments that marked the beginning of our adoption journey, because after that, we knew that adoption was what we wanted to do and that we were not going to miss out on anything. We knew that our life and our legacy was going to be that God had selected a child to be raised by us as one of our own, and we would not change that for anything in the world!
Our children will be so lucky to have such an amazing and loving Mom and I can’t wait to see as that happens in front of my very own eyes!
Okay, so I know how cliche it is to title the post #MCM, especially on a Monday. I did want to share a story about Luis.
A couple weekends ago, we had some friends of ours ask us to watch their 1 year old son. I was very excited, but also a bit nervous. I work with kids all day at work, but somehow knowing that I am responsible for the care of a small child with mom and dad not in the house made me nervous. Our friends have an amazingly well behaved and sweet kid. He is a joy to be around! Anyway, we were excited and ready to go. Luis did such an amazing job. He played games and was interactive and attentive. He did everything right, and was so confident with what he was doing. He really embodied all of the qualities that you dream about when you think of the qualities that you want for the father of your kids. He did amazing. His eyes lit up when playing with that kid. He was completely in his element. I didn’t know that parenting could look so natural until I saw him. It reminded me of when we were buying our house. I had seen houses before, but didn’t look at them with “buyers eyes”. I had seem Luis interact with kids before, but never really saw him through the same eyes as I did when I saw a glimpse of what he will be like as a dad.
I am so lucky to have an amazing husband who has a heart that longs to be a father. On the days that I am doubting myself, I know that I have an amazing partner to lean on. Adopting is hard. Parenting will be hard, and I know that we need to be united as a team. He has been so focused and excited when we talk about our future child. He has such a gracious heart, and prays daily for the woman that is (or will be) carrying our child. Since the day that we got married, Luis has looked forward to being a dad. I know that our baby will be just as blessed to have this man as their dad. This baby will be so lucky!
Luis, you are my #MCM, today and everyday, and I am so glad that I get to go on this journey with you. We have had our ups and downs, but there is no one on earth I would rather be on this crazy train with than you. I am so lucky that you get to be my baby’s father, and I can’t wait to see you thrive!