Still Waiting

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It has been a while since we have written an update regarding of our adoption process. We are still continuing to wait, which is something we are totally fine with. Our Adoption Agency is showing our profile to potential birth parents and one day, one of them will choose us or we will get a call from the agency that there is a child waiting.

In all honesty the wait has been long and we are grateful that we’ve had this time to prepare our home, our hearts and our lives to receive the kid that is meant for us. As you recall, last month we shared about the grief of a situation we were in a sense connected with (you can read about it here), and while we did receive word that the mother decided not make an adoption plan, we are grateful we were a part of that little baby’s life, even if we never get to meet her. We prayed for her and for the mother, we prayed that she would make the best choice she could for her baby and we hope she did.

You may have noticed that our adoption updates may have become less frequents these last few months and the reason is because there really is less to update you about. We completed our home study, we are listed, we are in a good track funding-wise (still working on a grant though), and really just waiting for what is next. Family and friends have been an incredible support to us through out this whole journey and we are so grateful for each and every one of you and we honestly could not do it without you all.

We both really hope the next big update is a big one, but in the meantime we continue to wait.

Love,

The Guerreros

 

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Hearts, home and bags ready

We had a difficult week last week. Without going into much detail we heard of a potential opportunity that seems to have fallen through by this point. While last week was definitely hard for us, we felt that if the time was right, we were ready to receive a child in our home.

Our baby room is pretty much all set. Obviously it will forever be a work in progress as we add and as a child grows in it, but we have the basics of what you need to welcome a child. First few months, the baby would sleep in our room obviously, but it is definitely good to know that we have everything pretty much set and ready to go.

One thing that we have learned and has been the hardest for us is that with adoption there is no time frame, it isn’t like having biological children that you know you have so many months to prepare for a child, that has been one of the hardest things for us. Yes, we could get a call that a pregnant woman wants to meet us and she may be half way through pregnancy or close to giving birth and that would give us some kind of hypothetical time frame, but we could also just get a call and have to take off. We are grateful that we have both had that talk with our employers that we may just need to leave suddenly one day and start our leave at work, we are both blessed to have understanding bosses that are perfectly OK with that happening.

We are more ready than we have ever been, our home and hearts are so ready for this!

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And what a year we had!

First of all, Happy New Year to all! We hope that this next year brings you what you want and hope for, and while 2016 may have been a rough year for many of us in many ways, the hope of a New Year means a fresh and clean start.

This last year was huge for us as we saw many things fall into place in our road to becoming parents. We started 2016 thinking maybe “this would be the one”, only to be reminded that adoption takes long and is a lot of waiting. This is not without saying that we knew for sure that we would have a baby this past year, but maybe with some hopes that things would move a little faster, and while things did move in the right direction we were reminded that all that is good is worth the wait.

We were however able to make some huge leaps in our journey:

  • We attended an incredible training with our adoption agency in which we were re-assured that we are doing the right thing and learned so much about the process. You can get a refresher of that by clicking here.
  • After much waiting we (FINALLY) were ready to be taken off from the waiting list for the waiting list and then became a listed family and are officially waiting (hopefully soon) for a call that either a birth family has picked us or the agency got word from a hospital that a baby has been born and they believe that should be our baby.
  • We are thankful that we were connected with such a great Social Worker to do our home study this year (click here to read some about it).
  • The baby room is turning from just being our spare/overflow room into a real room for a child (still a work in progress though). We purposely wanted to wait until all the other steps mentioned above were met to start setting up the room.

As you can tell, 2016 was a year that saw a lot of good moves in our life, and while we are still waiting for whatever comes next, we are grateful that things have taken the time they have. It is easy for people to say “it shouldn’t take this long to adopt” or “why does it take so long to adopt?”, but for us this has been perfect timing as we have had other things happen this year (Danielle starting Grad school!) and even still working on some fundraisers (as we finally started paying for some of the expenses that come along with adopting.

We don’t know what this new year will bring but we are sure this crazy and wild adoption adventure will continue, and we are excited to share it with you all!

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Happy New Year 2017 from the Guerreros!

Hope in what comes next

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Well family and friends, this is it, the moment we have been longing and waiting for. Agency paperwork has been sent to have a profile, homestudy approved and completed, adoption book mailed to the agency. Now we just wait for the call.

We have been waiting for this moment to come for a year and a half almost, there is nothing left for us to do but wait. Until now we had a goal in mind like “OK, well now we need to do this, or send this document, etc…”, we had stuff to do, but now all we have left is to wait. At any given time from now on we could get a call from the agency that a birth parent is interested in our profile and would like to meet us or we could get a call that a baby has been born and they feel we would be a good home for him or her. At this point all we have left is to wait and be patient and hope.

 

Things are actually finally moving

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The theme of the majority of 2016 for us has been WAIT, be patient, this is a theme that whether we wanted to or not, we learned we had to embrace, we had to do it and we had no way around it. Waiting has been the major theme for us, from moving from a waiting to wait list, to a waiting list and now we officially are an active family with our agency.

The last couple weeks we finally received our completed home study and this was submitted to the agency yesterday, meaning that in the eyes of the State of New Mexico we are fit to adopt parents. We also had to fill out lots of paperwork and go over things that we would be OK and not OK in a child, this last part was hard as we had to go over a list of things that we would be willing, consider or not be willing to parent. Some things we would not have a problem and others we had to cross out the list. We say weird because this list really is something we would even have to think of if we had biological children, and we kept being told that “there is no wrong answer”, but it still felt a little strange to go over what we feel comfortable.

So at this point we basically are finishing up the paperwork (of which there is a lot when you are adopting) and mailing that back to the agency so they can officially show our profile to birth parents. We also just a couple days ago received our photo album, which we will be giving to the agency as well. Once that happens we literally could get a call in a matter of weeks or even months, it is out of our hands completely as we wait to get a call from the agency.

Again, we wait, but this time this could be the final waiting before we become parents.

Just keep on waiting…

The light is becoming a little brighter

743473_70247642.jpgSo on Friday we got some great news from our agency! Not huge news, but it is news, which at this point any news is great news!

We get to go in May to Albuquerque (where our agency’s office is, which for those of you not local is about 2 1/2 hours from here) for our agency’s quarterly orientation/training for new adoptive families.

OK, so maybe it is huge news! This by no means is saying that we are close at all to completing our adoption process, but it is a step forward and at this point any step we take feels like a huge leap. After this event in May we will hopefully work on getting our home study done and then be listed for prospective birth moms to review our profile. How crazy is that?! We are both in awe that after almost a full year of praying, raising funds and preparing ourselves things seem to be moving along.

This event can’t come any faster!

 

Some things we’ve learned

Adoption Awareness Month is in full gear! As future adoptive parents, we love hearing and reading stories about families made and formed by the bonds of adoption. We believe that adoption is our gift from God and something we always wanted to do, yet it was meant to be His plan from the very beginning.

Here are some things that we would like to share about what this journey is like:

What is some advice you can give to others who want to adopt?

Adopting is a long road! We’ve had many conversations with friends and family lately where we have been asked about updates on our adoption and how the progress is going. We’ve also talked with others who are in the same path or may think about adopting. One thing you should be prepared is that it is a long road and it definitely takes a lot of energy and it takes a toll emotionally as well, there are ups and downs and sacrifices you need to make. It is not a road for everyone and you have to be prepared for unexpected happening. You also need to be sure this is what you want to do, if you want to adopt a child because it’s “trendy” or you “want to save all the needy children Angelina Jolie style”, then it is probably not for you, realize that you will be bringing a child to your home, to your life, to your family and this is not like when you adopt a pet, it is a commitment for a life time. Make sure you are 100% sure that adoption is what you want to do.

Do your research!

There are many different roads you can take when you are adopting, and really there is no way better than others. You can go through the state, you can go private domestic and international, each way has its pros and cons. Before you decide, make sure you have looked into each option before you make a decision as far as which route you are going to take.

Trust in your support system

Family and friends are extremely important partners when it comes to adoption and just like anything else in life, you shouldn’t do it alone. We’ve received an overwhelming amount of love from our families and friends and we are so excited to continue sharing this journey with them. It also helps talking to others who have been through adoption. When you talk to people about the fact that you are adopting, people love the idea but for most it is a foreign concept. We have been lucky enough to know others who have gone through the process that we can call and talk to and come with questions about the process or if we just need a voice to vent. Our parents and siblings have also been the biggest supporters we’ve had and we couldn’t do it without them. So whoever your support group is (your family, friends, church, co-workers, etc) please know that you can rely on them, they are placed in your life for a reason.

And lastly, your spouse…

Just like in any marriage and in parenting, your spouse is your #1 partner in the adventure of adoption. This year has been challenging for us as we decided to begin the adoption process and we have learned to rely on each other more than ever before, not that we didn’t before, but we have really grown even closer than ever before and have really taken that extra step to solidify our marriage and our roles in each other’s lives. Men and women react to certain situations differently and it has been awesome to get to learn how to comfort each other in this journey.

Adoption is definitely a blessing and we wouldn’t want it any other way, not now and not ever, it is definitely what we feel our calling is to be as parents.