Just like the title says, we love reading and hearing other stories about adoption. Recently we saw this on Facebook (click here to get to link). This couple went through a similar experience as us (except we didn’t really go to IVF or fertility path) and found adoption being the way for their life and their family.
Today, they still continue to maintain their blog in a similar fashion we hope to in the future after we have completed our adoption because we feel a big calling in our lives aside from being parents, is to help others cope and find support when it comes to adoption because even though there are tons of websites, many books and blogs, adoption is a hard journey and can seem like a hard and even lonely journey at time. Don’t get us wrong, family and friends have been a great support circle for us, but it is always great to hear and learn from other people’s experience who can relate to what we are going through.
Please check out their blog and we hope that ours inspires others in the future who may be in the journey of adoption or just starting.
We leave to Albuquerque, NM in just a few days to attend a mandatory CYFD adoption training through the adoption agency we are working with as stated in our previous blog post. This training serves a dual purposed, the first being of course a state required training in order to proceed with the adoption process and the second purpose to be introduced to the agency staff as well as officially begin the process of adoption. We are still a long ways away from actually having our child placed in our home and in our lives, but it is actually starting. This is actually happening.
The adoption process is officially starting.
For what has been about a year we have been getting our finances in order, praying, preparing and getting excited for one of the biggest adventures in our lives. This year has been very trying as we have been faced with our fears and have learned to overcome them (like for example, how in the world are we going to afford this?), but we have also grown closer and have been in the process of being molded into the parents that we are going to be.
But now things are getting real. It is no longer “hey, we are planning on adopting!”, it is shifting and transitioning into “we are starting the process of adoption”. This is the moment we have been waiting for, and some time in the future that will end in us being parents.
We are amazed at how things have progressed and there is still a long process to go, but we are excited that things are finally moving along and can’t wait to tell you all about the training and what our next steps will be.
Hi Family and Friends!
Sorry for the lack of posting over the last month, we have been a little busy and also not too much has happened other than the yard sale. As we said in previous posts, we kind of entered this weird stage of nothing happening with our adoption and just stagnant waiting, but this is taking a change…
We are going to our adoption training in a couple weeks!
A couple weeks ago we got our official invitation from the agency inviting us to attend their training, which is the official beginning of the adoption process with them. Of course, we are still months (maybe even up to another year) away from actually have a child in our arms, but this is the very beginning as we have so far mostly been fundraising and have moved from waiting list to waiting list.
After this training (which is a state mandated training) for adoption we will hopefully soon schedule our home study so that after that long process is completed (it can take up to 90 days to complete), our profile can be shown to birth mothers that the agency works with and hopefully we get the call that a woman has chosen to give us her baby for adoption. Again, this all could easily still be several months or even up to a year, but we are hopeful that it will happen.
The training is a state mandated training but will also have some great activities like learning about the agency, meeting the staff in person, testimonials from families that have adopted, adoptees and even birth moms that have given their babies for adoption. We have a lot to look forward to with this training, it will be an encouraging, but also an emotional few days, but totally worth it in the end.
This weekend we had our adoption yard sale fundraiser, and boy did we not know what we were signing up for! It was a lot of work but definitely the hard work paid off.
From family and friends gathering stuff and spring cleaning their homes, to volunteers that showed up to help set up and clean up as well as friends that so graciously let us borrow their home and space to have our yard sale, this became another clear example to us of the community that loves us and supports us and that we are so grateful to be a part of and that we also can’t wait until we have this child placed in our home and lives to share this joy with some day.
As we got a chance to rest and debrief about it, we are so grateful for all the help. We started the morning around 4:30 to get ready and set up and had some early birds waiting already to go over our stuff. We also were amazed at what seems to be this yard sale sub-culture we did not know much about, as we folks came and went looking for what they needed, it was awesome to know that every dollar is going towards the adoption fund we have working so hard to increase.
From the bottom of our hearts, thank you!
So on Friday we got some great news from our agency! Not huge news, but it is news, which at this point any news is great news!
We get to go in May to Albuquerque (where our agency’s office is, which for those of you not local is about 2 1/2 hours from here) for our agency’s quarterly orientation/training for new adoptive families.
OK, so maybe it is huge news! This by no means is saying that we are close at all to completing our adoption process, but it is a step forward and at this point any step we take feels like a huge leap. After this event in May we will hopefully work on getting our home study done and then be listed for prospective birth moms to review our profile. How crazy is that?! We are both in awe that after almost a full year of praying, raising funds and preparing ourselves things seem to be moving along.
This event can’t come any faster!
To say the phrase above relates to our adoption journey is probably an understatement of our adoption journey and the process that has been developing in our hearts.
First of all, we realized that it was almost around a year ago when we started to wonder if having kids “the natural way” was even an option for us. We had a lot of doubt and a lot fear in our minds, we weren’t sure even if we wanted to face the thought that maybe we were struggling with infertility. One day it hit us like a ton of bricks, we knew that maybe that was the reason why every month that test kept saying negative and that perhaps it was time to start exploring other options. That was the moment when our hearts began this transformation towards adoption.
We have said before that adoption was something we always thought we wanted to do and something we saw ourselves down the line doing, so maybe this is why the shift was a little easier than we would have thought at first. God knew that our hearts would endure the challenge and patience of going through the adoption process.
Even this is not about us.
Many things had to happen for us to get to the point of deciding that adoption was the way for us and that our family would be somewhat “non traditional” (because to us, there is nothing non traditional about adopting, although in the general sense of some people it might be). We often think of the blessing that child will be in our lives, and also about the fact that this child is being hand picked by God to live and be raised in our home and how He is giving him or her the opportunity to live in a loving home.
Yes, our family will not be the norm in the eyes of the world but it will be to us, and our kids through the gift of adoption.
The picture above is exactly how we have been feeling lately, like we are buffering. Over a month ago we finally heard from our agency that we are off the “unofficial” waiting list onto the “official” waiting list. We know this can sound confusing because it is…the agency we are working only works with 10 families and has a waiting list of 5 families, so we were waiting to get into the list of 5 so we can be one of the 10 that they actively work with.
Last month we filled all our adoption application paperwork as well as the first part of our home study paperwork and were told that we would hear back from them as soon as we were ready to move up on the list again. This is why we feel like we have entered an “adoption buffering zone”, where we are just waiting for something to happen.
A lot of people ask us what is going on and in all honesty we wish we had better news for you all, this is why we haven’t been updating the blog very much but hopefully we hear some news soon. In the mean time we keep waiting, and waiting, and will keep waiting.
Here is a picture of Danielle filling out our adoption application (OK, we are filling it together but she has prettier handwriting) and our cat photobombing her in the back.
The application is very detailed and asks a lot of personal information and so does the whole process, but as we fill this out we are in awe that we finally have reached this point in this adoption adventure. We still have a long way to go and this is only the beginning, it will still be a couple months until we do our home study, state/adoption orientation and then on to waiting for a pregnant woman to pick us to adopt her baby, but this is where it starts and financially we are still a little more than half way where we need to be, but we will get there.
2016 so far is starting awesome!
OK, huge to us!
Today we received a very awesome e-mail that we were not expecting at all. Our adoption agency let us know that we are officially on the waiting list, the actual waiting list!
Let’s pause for a second and explain what this means. The agency we are working with has a list of 10 active families that are listed and their profiles are shown to potential birth mothers. When we first signed up with the agency we were added to a waiting-waiting list and now we have been bumped up to the official waiting list, of which they only allow 5 families to be on at all times. This means as families adopt their child, we move up on the list, and this means there are only 4 families ahead of us and then we are officially an active family after that, which means we will be one step closer to adopt our kid.
So what happens next? This is the even more exciting part of the huge news we received. We were sent the adoption application and questionnaires for our home study and we need to fill them out before January 18th. This means…WE FOR REAL OFFICIALLY GET TO START THE ADOPTION PROCESS!!!
Yes, this is not anymore “hey we are adopting and hey we are on a list and we are waiting”, this means we actually get to begin the process of adoption. This is so crazy!
We will keep you posted on the next steps of the process, but we are both overjoyed and can’t believe that this huge step just happened!
And just like that, 2015 is over, it’s gone and it is never coming back!
We say this because 2015 was the definition of a roller coaster for us, but in a good way. As we reminisce on what last year brought to our lives, we can’t help but to think where we were one year ago. As we were driving back from some friends house roughly past midnight, we remembered how a year ago was one of those many days when we were hoping we were finally expecting, only to be dissapointed a couple days later with that not being the case. It became a month to month occurrence for us, until we started wondering around April and May that maybe there was a reason why the test was always negative and why maybe it wasn’t happening for us.
You all know where we came from when we began our adoption journey back in June of this year (and if not, you can read our first blog post here) and as we decided we would commit to adoption, there was also a big factor of insecurity for us, specially in the financial aspect as we decided to go through the route of a private domestic adoption, which is very costly and there is no way around that. We were afraid of that huge number and were unsure if we could even ever get to that number, but it really is by the grace of God and our very loving friends and family who have helped and participated in our various fundraising events, that the number seems less and less scary every day, which not so long ago seemed like an impossible thing for us.
As we are entering 2016, we don’t know when we will get the call saying “Mr and Mrs Guerrero, we have a baby for you” or “a pregnant woman has picked you to adopt her child”, we just don’t know when that will happen, but we are taking baby steps (pun accidentally intended) to make that moment happen.
Last year was a very challenging, yet eye opening and good year for us and we are looking forward to what this year is going to bring!
Happy New Year from our family to yours!
Luis & Danielle