Nesting and other fun stuff

targetSo far we have been slightly slow on the “getting the baby room ready” department, this is mostly because of the fact that we have been on the waiting list to be on the waiting list, and then on another official waiting list. We didn’t want to get too excited about buying baby things, assembling furniture and preparing the room because we figured “it’s going to be a while”.

That is until now of course! If you scroll down to our previous blog post (as in this one right here), you will remember that we FINALLY got taken off the official waiting list and are now ready to be moved to being an active family for potential birth parents to view our profile. We have been careful with not setting up the baby room and getting too much baby stuff until this point. We’ve been given a few things like a crib, bassinet, high chair and a few necessities. Today we bought a few other things to set up “the room” and feels great to be nesting.

The time is coming close for us…well at least we would like to think it is close. Yesterday we got to fill out some paperwork (some of it hard to do, more on that in a later post) and our home study is just about finalized. We are about to officially become a “listed” family with our agency, Adoption Assistance Agency. The Agency we are working with only works with 10 families at a time and we are getting moved up to being one of those active families that they work with. This means once everything is set to go we could get a call in a matter of weeks or it could be months (or longer) that either a birth parent is interested in our profile or they could call us telling us a baby has been born that fits our profile. We are being proactive and trying to be as ready as we can for when the baby comes because as we have said before, when you’re adopting there really isn’t a specific time frame to wait, it could be from one moment to another that we could be parents.

We want to be ready for you!

Love,

Future Mom and Dad!

 

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Birthmoms and what they mean to us

birth-mother

(In order to protect the privacy of these brave women, we are omitting names or even stories we have heard, as those are not ours to tell).

One of the things we loved the most about the training we attended was the panel towards the end where we were introduced to adopted parents, adoptees and birthmothers who had placed their children for adoption. We really enjoyed hearing all of the stories and experiences, but what we got the most out of was the stories we heard from the birth mothers and their experience.

Before going to this training, one of the things that we had conversations about was the subject of open vs closed adoptions. We had talked with our friends that have adopted, and got a wide variety of feedback about their personal experiences. At first, the term “open adoption” seemed a bit daunting, and it was hard for us to visualize what that would look like. Based on our research, personal experience, and the guidance from others, we felt that a semi open adoption was something that we were interested in. Throughout the weekend, we felt our hearts be moved so deeply for the birthmoms that we met. We felt a confirmation in our hearts that having the option to contact the birth mom, and keep her or her family updated on the life of our child, is not only something that we are open to, but something that we are excited for. It is easy to get caught up in differences and worries. It is easy to worry about the things that make an open adoption sound scary. We have learned that although we may be very different in many ways, there is one thing that is the same. We both love this child. We both will make life changing sacrifices for this child. We both will see The Lord in new and amazing ways through the gift of adoption. We both are different pieces of the puzzle of who our child is, and we would not be complete without each other.

Birth mothers make a huge sacrifice when they decide to place their child for adoption, sometimes they decide on their own, sometimes the birth father or their parents are involved in their decision. Regardless of what moved them to make that decision, there is still grief, there is a loss and there is the need for healing. One of the things we loved the most about our agency is the fact that they continue to offer support and counseling to the birth families as well, as some agencies kind of just match and then it is the end of the story. They are often forgotten or just seen as a means to an end to a family who is adopting and then they are just left to deal with it on their own. We talked at length with the case worker during our consultation about the process of healing and what that looks like for them, which is why they encourage that even if a closed adoption is what the birth mom wants to still write letter and maybe send pictures to the agency as they have seen before that in some cases they will come or contact them just wanting to know how the child is doing and this also helps them heal and be reassured that they made the right choice.

We know nothing about our birth mother, if she will want an open or a closed adoption, if she will want to get pictures and letters or not. We don’t know what she likes, what her background is or anything. We don’t know if the birth father will be involved in the decision, or won’t care. There is so much we don’t know, but we are excited to get to that place, even if that is still a while away. Birth mothers are strong.

Adoption training in a couple weeks

Hi Family and Friends!

Sorry for the lack of posting over the last month, we have been a little busy and also not too much has happened other than the yard sale. As we said in previous posts, we kind of entered this weird stage of nothing happening with our adoption and just stagnant waiting, but this is taking a change…

IMG_0741We are going to our adoption training in a couple weeks!

A couple weeks ago we got our official invitation from the agency inviting us to attend their training, which is the official beginning of the adoption process with them. Of course, we are still months (maybe even up to another year) away from actually have a child in our arms, but this is the very beginning as we have so far mostly been fundraising and have moved from waiting list to waiting list.

After this training (which is a state mandated training) for adoption we will hopefully soon schedule our home study so that after that long process is completed (it can take up to 90 days to complete), our profile can be shown to birth mothers that the agency works with and hopefully we get the call that a woman has chosen to give us her baby for adoption. Again, this all could easily still be several months or even up to a year, but we are hopeful that it will happen.

The training is a state mandated training but will also have some great activities like learning about the agency, meeting the staff in person, testimonials from families that have adopted, adoptees and even birth moms that have given their babies for adoption. We have a lot to look forward to with this training, it will be an encouraging, but also an emotional few days, but totally worth it in the end.

 

 

HUGE news we need to share

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OK, huge to us!

Today we received a very awesome e-mail that we were not expecting at all. Our adoption agency let us know that we are officially on the waiting list, the actual waiting list!

Let’s pause for a second and explain what this means. The agency we are working with has a list of 10 active families that are listed and their profiles are shown to potential birth mothers. When we first signed up with the agency we were added to a waiting-waiting list and now we have been bumped up to the official waiting list, of which they only allow 5 families to be on at all times. This means as families adopt their child, we move up on the list, and this means there are only 4 families ahead of us and then we are officially an active family after that, which means we will be one step closer to adopt our kid.

Oh wow!

So what happens next? This is the even more exciting part of the huge news we received. We were sent the adoption application and questionnaires for our home study and we need to fill them out before January 18th. This means…WE FOR REAL OFFICIALLY GET TO START THE ADOPTION PROCESS!!!

Yes, this is not anymore “hey we are adopting and hey we are on a list and we are waiting”, this means we actually get to begin the process of adoption. This is so crazy!

We will keep you posted on the next steps of the process, but we are both overjoyed and can’t believe that this huge step just happened!

The night before Christmas 

I (Luis) always loved reading this as a a kid, can’t wait to be able to share this with our kids:

‘Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house

Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse;

The stockings were hung by the chimney with care,

In hopes that St. Nicholas soon would be there;

The children were nestled all snug in their beds;

While visions of sugar-plums danced in their heads;

And mamma in her ‘kerchief, and I in my cap,

Had just settled our brains for a long winter’s nap,

When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter,

I sprang from my bed to see what was the matter.

Away to the window I flew like a flash,

Tore open the shutters and threw up the sash.

The moon on the breast of the new-fallen snow,

Gave a lustre of midday to objects below,

When what to my wondering eyes did appear,

But a miniature sleigh and eight tiny rein-deer,

With a little old driver so lively and quick,

I knew in a moment he must be St. Nick.

More rapid than eagles his coursers they came,

And he whistled, and shouted, and called them by name:

“Now, Dasher! now, Dancer! now Prancer and Vixen!

On, Comet! on, Cupid! on, Donner and Blitzen!

To the top of the porch! to the top of the wall!

Now dash away! dash away! dash away all!”

As leaves that before the wild hurricane fly,

When they meet with an obstacle, mount to the sky;

So up to the housetop the coursers they flew

With the sleigh full of toys, and St. Nicholas too—

And then, in a twinkling, I heard on the roof

The prancing and pawing of each little hoof.

As I drew in my head, and was turning around,

Down the chimney St. Nicholas came with a bound.

He was dressed all in fur, from his head to his foot,

And his clothes were all tarnished with ashes and soot;

A bundle of toys he had flung on his back,

And he looked like a pedler just opening his pack.

His eyes—how they twinkled! his dimples, how merry!

His cheeks were like roses, his nose like a cherry!

His droll little mouth was drawn up like a bow,

And the beard on his chin was as white as the snow;

The stump of a pipe he held tight in his teeth,

And the smoke, it encircled his head like a wreath;

He had a broad face and a little round belly

That shook when he laughed, like a bowl full of jelly.

He was chubby and plump, a right jolly old elf,

And I laughed when I saw him, in spite of myself;

A wink of his eye and a twist of his head

Soon gave me to know I had nothing to dread;

He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work,

And filled all the stockings; then turned with a jerk,

And laying his finger aside of his nose,

And giving a nod, up the chimney he rose;

He sprang to his sleigh, to his team gave a whistle,

And away they all flew like the down of a thistle.

But I heard him exclaim, ere he drove out of sight—

“Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good night!”

Happy Adoption Day (from the Guerreros)

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Yes! Today is one of our favorite days of the year: National Adoption Day!

Join us and celebrate with us thinking and praying about children needing homes and loving families. This year has changed our lives and our hearts so much as we’ve been preparing for adoption, and what a better time as the Holidays are approaching to get ready for a great next year.

Happy Adoption Day!

Love, The Guerreros